Just posted something on here about emotional and relational growth. How much it can hurt and the fact that it occasionally sucks.
Hate it when my words get tested when they are still fresh in my mind!
Without being specific and naming names (because I’m not going to get petty like that!) it has become clear to me that some people just do not know how to be happy or let others be happy. They carry this emotional ugliness with them like toxic sludge and they make sure to smear it all over the paths of those they encounter. They don’t know how to be happy when good things happen to others because they are too busy resenting the person rather than celebrating with and for them!
When you come to the sludge others have left in your way, you have a choice to make. You can wallow in the sludge, flinging some of it back at the person who left it there, and lowering yourself to his/her level in the process. You can attempt to defend yourself against the unkind words that spew from their mouths out of habit. If you choose this option, you will eventually become a person who leaves the sludge of emotional ugliness in the path of others.
Or you can look around for those moments of brightness that have been placed in your path by those who have a much healthier, less self-centered approach to life! You can choose to listen to the voices of those cheering you on to bigger and better things. You can rise to the challenges before you and face them head on, choosing to work your tail end off to make something amazing happen.
In case you haven’t guessed, I’m dealing with some “sludge-flingers” right now. So far I’ve been able to handle the situation with relative ease. Now they are choosing to fling sludge meant for me at one of my children. It’s just not cool to put my kids in the middle of their ugliness and luckily the child in question has a decent head on her shoulders so I am not worried about her.
It would be so easy to start flinging ugly right back at them. It might almost feel cathartic. I mean, Mama Bear would LOVE to defend her cub!
Nope. Not going there.
I am in the midst of trying to realize a 20 year dream and I am absolutely surrounded by people who are cheering me on, working alongside me to help it happen, or who simply love on me regardless of what else is going on. These people bring so much laughter, love, and joy to my life that I feel positively overwhelmed by it at times. Truthfully, the joy-bringers outnumber the sludge-flingers pretty significantly (sorry for the rhyme – it was truly unintended!).
So today I choose to step around the piles of emotional “ick” left in my way. My focus is on all of the loving, positive, encouraging people in my life. The sludge bearers are wasting their time. I’m choosing happy!